Logbook 3

So, today was not that eventful. The only thing that happened was that a love letter from S arrived in the mail today. During our break up talk, he mentioned that he sent it out already and that he still wanted me to read it. So I did.

I was so nervous about reading the letter. I was worried that it would touch my heart in a way that would have made me regret my decision to break up. I read the letter soon after seeing it because I did not want my nerves to act up. The letter was sweet and well written. He talked about how much he was thankful that I have been there for him and he said a lot of really nice things about me.

I feel like a bitch when I say this, but S's letter made me feel nothing. I think it's a sweet gesture, but to me, the letter gave me no feelings and that made me so happy. It reaffirmed that I made the right decision in breaking up. It actually made me feel giddy that I felt nothing. You can read the letter below if you desire.

S's Love Letter to Me

The rest of the day went well. I talked to my friend D. They made a comment saying they admired how well I handle breakups. That comment really hit me because I have never been in love. I honestly don't know what heartbreak feels like. It made me think back to S's words. I wondered again if I was not capable of falling in love. D told me I was being silly and that I definitely will fall in love one day. It didn't reassure me much, but I'm deciding not to dwell on the matter.

I guess there wasn't much personal growth today. Only the affirmation of my feelings happened. I wonder if anything will happen tomorrow.

W

Have you ever received a love letter?